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Big Time Baby

by Lesley Barth

supported by
Mike Bankhead
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Mike Bankhead Lovely album that manages to cross a few different genres, but all united by Lesley's soothing voice and nifty songwriting. "If Love Doesn't Change You" will break your heart in the best way. Favorite track: If Love Doesn't Change You.
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1.
I lost my love on the Lower East Side - Drove off to park and he hitched a ride. He called the next day a country away How come my babies never stay? My love it was true, my love it was kind. Its eyes were so blue that you’d lose your mind. I wanted to cross but the river was wide. Ah There’s something ‘bout fear that clings to your bones. In a room full of friends you still feel alone. And it gets too hard to pick up the phone. Ah I’m not ready for the big time, baby. I’m not ready for the big time. I’m not ready for the big time, baby I’m not ready for the big time. I held out my heart in a paper bag. He took a big bite and threw it right back. Now I’m always unsure of just what I lacked. Ah Oh the blindness of youth it makes us too bold, But the sadness of age can make us too cold. If I ever hit the sweet spot I didn’t know. Ah I’m not ready for the big time, baby. I’m not ready for the big time. I lost my love on the Lower East Side. I lost my love on the Lower East Side. I lost my love on the Lower East Side. I’m not ready for the big love, baby. I’m not ready for the big love. I’m not ready for the big time, baby. I’m not ready for the big time.
2.
There’s a layer under a layer Under the layer of my skin. There’s a story behind the story Behind the story of my sins. And I’ve looked at this square so long Just thinking it’s a triangle. And I’ve looked at my face so long Craning my neck for the right angle. But who is the who looking back At the woman looking back at me? Who is the who looking back At the woman looking back at me? There’s a memory before the memory Before the memory of my youth. We’re all outlines within the outline, And we keep searching for some truth. And I’ve looked at this square so long Just thinking it’s a triangle. And I’ve looked at my face so long Craning my neck for the right angle. But who is the who looking back At the woman looking back at me? Who is the who looking back At the woman looking back at me? Mirrors within mirrors - How our reflections curve and bend! And each end brings us to the beginning And we all go round again! Who is the who looking back At the woman looking back at me? Who is the who looking back At the woman looking back at me?
3.
Nashville 04:01
A voice - he’s got a voice That could break a young girl’s heart. A dream - he’s got a dream. But sometimes, it feels so far. He’s playing cover guitar at this late night bar With his drawl and his cowboy hat. Think he’s looking for luck in this Big Apple town, But I suspect it isn’t just that. He said he came to New York ‘cause it pleased him. But he must not be in Nashville for a reason. Hope - well, he’s got some hope. Doesn’t look like all has been lost. But grief - well, he’s got that, too. He tries to bury it deep, but at what cost? He’s throwing back beers with his rock and roll peers, But it’s always “thank you, m’am” when I fill his cup. He bought a leather jacket to try and blend in But his steel-toed boots and sadness gave him up. He said he came to New York for the seasons. But he must not be in Nashville for a reason. Running away looks so different from Running towards something or towards someone. Wonder what it was that made him run. Well it’s been a couple years and he’s still playing here. Traded his Taylor for a Fender Strat. But he still plays George Jones after the patrons go home. You can watch as the songs take him back. Life is short - sometimes it works in seasons. But it’s nothing you can get your guarantees in. I’m not suggesting leaving home is treason. But he must not be in Nashville for a reason.
4.
There’s no chance he’s gonna put you first You gotta put you first. All your plans just turn to dirt Your grief just fuels the hurt. They give you just enough to keep you hungry for more You gotta hand it to the man - He knows just how to touch you. You gotta hand it to the man, But he’s never gonna love you. He’s just a growing flame And you crave the heat while he takes all he can. And though he’s taken nearly everything, You still gotta hand it to the man. You’ve begged him to finally let you in, But don’t waste your breath with him. He’s no good; you can quit your wondering, It won’t change anything. They give you just enough to keep you hungry for more [CHORUS] Somebody told me there’s no gain without some pain. But I’ve never seen a flower grow without sunshine only rain. [CHORUS]
5.
A little bit older, but wiser the same. A little bit sadder, but I’ve just me to blame. I broke what I had for the allure of the thrill. If love doesn’t change you, then loneliness will. A glass of your strongest, no matter the taste. Here’s to one I loved longest and let go to waste. If only we watered the things we wanted to grow. If love doesn’t change you, then love you don’t know. How warm was his laughter. How bright was his smile. In the darkness of after, you could see it for miles. Now I’ve just got a memory of a man that was good. If love doesn’t change you, well, maybe it should. A little bit older, but wiser the same. A little bit sadder, but ain’t that part of the game? We break what we have for we know not how to build. I don’t know if love’s changed me. I don’t know if love’s changed me. I don’t know if love’s changed me - but I pray that it will.
6.
C: Asked your friends how you have been. They said back on cigarettes - L: I lit one up the night after you walked out. You’ve been kinda out of touch, Probably drinking way too much. Both: But somehow I miss having you around. Both: ‘Cause you make everything look good C: Smoking cigarettes L: Getting blackout drunk C: Making bad decisions Both: And I’m not movin’ on like I should. ‘Cause baby you make everything look good. L: Thought I saw you yesterday L: But was just some guy preaching on the train C: When I blinked you disappeared L: Interrupting the peace of weary commuters. C: Am I losing my mind? L: Made me want to reach back out. Made me want to go to church. Both: For the first time in my life, I was a believer. Both: ‘Cause you make everything look good C: Waking people up, L: Making vague decrees, Yelling on the subway. Both: And I’m not movin’ on like I should. ‘Cause baby you make everything look good. L: Last night at the bar You kept reaching for her hand. C: Well it’s a free world, and I don’t owe you nothing. L: So I turned to walk away C: I get why you couldn’t stay, but Both: Would it have killed you to say something? Both: ‘Cause you make everything look good. L: Wasting people’s time. C: Breaking people’s hearts, L: Leaving things unspoken. Both: And I’m not movin’ on like I should. Cause baby you make everything look good.
7.
Never been good at making decisions We both can agree it’s no strength of yours, too. So I think it’s strange that we take it as given That you’ve chosen me and I’ve chosen you. We could go on the road for months or we could stay in the city. Have a couple of kids and make life a new. And it’s not that you’ve made me a better person Though I suspect that that’s probably true - It’s that you chose me, and that I chose you. You will take several hours to pick out a restaurant. And I’m thirty-one and I still don’t know who I am. And it’s not that there aren’t a few other people With whom we could happily be - It’s that I choose you, and that you choose me. Never been good at making decisions We both can agree it’s no strength of yours, too. So I think it’s strange that we take it as given That you’ve chosen me and I’ve chosen you. There’s so much pain ahead if we are lucky. And one million ways that all this could end. But if we live long enough to travel to space And make love on the face of the moon. I hope you’ll choose me, I hope I’ll choose you. I hope you’ll choose me, I hope I’ll choose Never been good at making decisions.
8.
Not Tonight 05:00
The ice clinks in your glass As evening comes to pass. Those nighttime worries begin to disappear. A window opens up As you refill both cups. The cool breeze and the gin fight back our fears. We don’t recall yesterday’s sins. When morning comes, we’ll sin again. We’ll quit someday, but not tonight. His hand clings to your dress And, well, you know the rest. Those nighttime worries begin to disappear. Your phone begins to ring. That old, familiar sting. But the fire in his touch fights back your fear. We don’t recall yesterday’s sins. When morning comes, we’lll sin again. We’ll quit someday, but not tonight.
9.
I’m a little rough around the edges. Sometimes I fear the center won’t hold. It’s been a little time since I felt easy. I’ve been climbing for years, But it’s getting old. Wish I knew what I was reaching for. Maybe I’m just scared of the ground. So I’m up in in the air, walking the wire. So unprepared for anything real. And I’ve tried to quit drinking, But it just made me thirsty. So I’m up in the air. That’s how this feels. I get a little hazy in the morning. Don’t take much to keep me in bed. It’s been a while since I felt anything Apart from these dreams in my head. I wish I knew what I was running from. But I’m too afraid to look down. So I’m up in the air, walking the wire. So unprepared for anything real. And I’ve tried to quit dreaming, But it just makes me restless. So I’m up in the air. That’s how this feels. Oh the feeling of equilibrium - no one’s making a sound. They all clap as you rise, you’re alone coming down. Wish I knew what I was running from. But I’m too afraid to look down. So I’m up in the air, walking the wire. So unprepared for what’s headed my way. And I’ve tried to quit wanting, But it just made my heart break. So I’m up in the air and afraid that I’ll stay up in the air - Hope I come down someday.
10.
I didn’t know if it would come. I thought maybe I did something wrong. Didn’t know when I’d be done. Didn’t know it could take so long. Didn’t know how I would feel Or just how bright the sun would get. It’s hard to know it’s real. I know the bad times aren’t over yet. But I wish I could let myself feel good about something good. Instead of wondering if I could be working harder, Oh, I just want to feel something good. I didn’t know if I would make it, It’s been a long and lonely road. It ain’t the bump - it’s how you take it. But life is such a heavy load. And I wish I could let myself feel good about something good. Instead of wondering if I could be doing better, Oh I just want to feel something good. Worry later, child. You just don’t know how long we get. Life gets pretty wild. So I wish I could let myself feel good about something good. Instead of wondering if I could be someone better, Oh I just want to feel something good. Oh I just want to feel something good. Oh I just want to feel something.

about

"A soul-stirring second record." - American Songwriter

"Lesley Barth is a woman on a mission." - Folk Radio UK

"As good as her previous records were, this one is a real step up." 27 Leggies

credits

released May 15, 2020

All songs by Lesley Barth (BMI)

Produced by Joe Michelini and Lesley Barth at Berlin Studios
Engineered by Joe Michelini at Berlin Studios
Mixed by Joe Michelini at Berlin Studios
Mastered by Alan Douches at West West Side Music

Lead and backing vocals, piano, acoustic guitar, keyboards: Lesley Barth
Electric guitar, bass, and acoustic guitar on 4: Joe Michelini
Organ, piano on 5,6,7,9: Chuck Ramsey
Drums and percussion: Shane Luckenbaugh
Saxophone: Stephen Chen
Strings, Strings & String Arrangement on 10: Michael Hunter
Pedal Steel Guitar: Tim Campbell

Photography: Harish Pathak at the South Philly Van Club

Thank you to all my listeners, friends, family, and my supportive community on Patreon.

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Lesley Barth New York, New York

NYC singer/songwriter Lesley Barth's debut full-length Green Hearts, a 2017 album charting the course of young love, has been referred to as "one of the most intelligent, evocative albums to appear in recent years (Anti-Heroin Chic)."

Barth's sophomore album, Big Time Baby, will be out May 15th, 2020.
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